Why do men love mistresses. Why does a man need a mistress if he loves his wife

Problems modern men in that they are all unfinished. Well, almost everything. The fact that a woman quickly agrees to SCS does not mean at all that she then gives a man pleasure. Because often SKS in their bed does not smell.

I've been doing sks since I was 17 years old. Now I'm 29. I've never been married and have never - not a day of my life - worked. I live in the center of Kyiv in a fairly good apartment. I have a car and the courage to admit: I am a mistress. I meet married men for the sake of sex, and he - in return - support me. The longest romance in my life lasted a year and a half. The shortest is two months. One day everything can change, but now I do not plan to change anything.

Men need lovers.

Simply because they do not tolerate monotony. For example. Sometimes a man wants to punch his boss in the face, but, of course, for a number of reasons, he cannot do this. He needs to urgently sublimate this into sks. And he goes to bed with me. Why with me? Because then he dresses, ties this stupid tie around his neck, as if tightening the noose, and through his teeth he says how he hates this some Ivan Petrovich.

And I calmly nod and answer: "Come tomorrow, I'll cook the duck, and then I'll make min @ t." And he comes because he needs to relax. Feel important and buy time to figure out what to do. And the wife, like me, cannot say: she has children, a house, a teacher younger son- fool, the powder is over, and eldest daughter wants to get a piercing in his young nose. And if she agrees to SCS, then only in the pose of a tired log. She doesn't care about his boss at all. For her - compared to her daughter's piercing - this is not a problem at all. I don't care about this boss either, but I don't give a damn about it, and I have the time and energy to pretend it isn't. Here is a man and gets a mistress. And nothing personal! Only sks.

And he goes to bed with me.

Why with me?

Because then he dresses, ties this stupid tie around his neck, as if tightening the noose, and through his teeth he says how he hates this some Ivan Petrovich. And I calmly nod and answer: "Come tomorrow, I'll cook the duck, and then I'll make min @ t."

It so happened that women are much more selfish than men. How can I explain this ... We need everything at once, but - from one man; men also need everything at once, but from different women.

All because they know how to truly appreciate the time spent with me: sometimes we only have one hour. Bachelors in this regard are terribly spoiled, they need to be conquered. You know, jump over them with a rattle in your hands and hope they want to play with you. Married people are different. And in SCS, as a rule, they agree to experiments with great excitement: the monotony of family life pushes them to take risks. And they are more generous. The family teaches them to share. It is especially good if he has children: they make a man sentimental, and he can easily take his mistress to Paris, just to drink champagne with her in an expensive hotel, from whose window you can see the Eiffel Tower illuminated by dozens of lanterns or a magnificent view to Montmartre - once passion flared up here famous artist Modigliani, and now here he is seducing his mistress. What could be more pretentious and skapilnee? By the way, oddly enough, I have higher education and I really know who Modigliani is.

In 90% of cases, I choose married men.

I have had many married men.

Some of them loved me more than their wives; others thought they loved me more than their wives. But most still loved their wives more than me. And therefore I can say for sure that sks for the sake of sks exists.

All men are different.

Someone needs to change twice in the history of family life, someone needs it regularly.

It does not depend on the sincerity of their feelings for their wife.

Libido and nothing else.

Once I had a lover - the owner of a company for the manufacture of armored doors, an imposing, dear man - well, it loved to tell me about his wife and how he respects her. Then, out of inexperience, I was angry: how can you respect and fuck with another? It took me several years to realize that for many men a mistress is the same as expensive car in the garage. He periodically fiddles with her, boasts of her to friends, sometimes goes on vacation with her. But if the house suddenly burns, he will first of all save his wife and children. And burn it - the machine. And he will not leave his family for the sake of a car.

Not all men cheat. Some are afraid. Others are lazy. Still others - they really don’t want to, there are such people too.

My friends, those who know how and how I live, say that I have male look to the world.

I just call it "the world I live in".

Am I offended that many men who sleep with me do not love me - this is a topic for a separate post.

One thing I know for sure: you can not accept that your man has taken a mistress, but it is quite possible to understand why he did it.

What worries all women on the planet? What are we unlikely to ever come to terms with? There is only one answer - betrayal of a loved one. Men can change even when everything is in perfect order in the family. The question arises: why do you need someone else, if everything is already so good? Why is this imbalance in the relationship necessary? And still, contrary to common sense, men manage to find a mistress. But why should they? Let's try to understand.

Let's find a reasonable explanation for the actions of a man. When there is a family loving wife, to start a mistress, even from a material point of view, it is unprofitable. And what can we say about psychological stress. All this "pampering" then goes sideways, turns into monetary costs and constant stress. Ask why? This is because a man, knowing full well that big troubles can await him, goes to his passion, instead of going home, where his family, hot dinner and love are waiting for him. Even if the time spent with her mistress is much better than the time lost in front of the TV, the wife will still gradually begin to guess about what is happening, doubt the honesty and fidelity of her husband, slowly losing patience and trust.

Having a mistress is a risky undertaking

The husband is very lucky if the wife is not too jealous and does not suspect him at every step, and the “comfort woman” understands and endures everything. But when the opposite is true, which happens quite often, then the man can’t say hello. He will rush, as they say, "between two fires", fighting off both women. In general, such psychological pressure is quite difficult to withstand, especially when it comes from both sides. Although, despite all this, a man still gets a mistress. He understands what he is getting into, because he is not a stupid person, but this does not prevent him from voluntarily climbing into the noose.

But just why is this needed? Just because the instincts of the male so command? If so, then it is better not to make permanent connections that oblige you to something. This is quite convenient: no one will rattle their nerves, make demands. You just, as they say, "came, saw, conquered." There is no hassle, no worries that a wife can find out about her husband's "exploits". And if a comfort woman is constant, then this can end badly. After some time, she will definitely want the man to be completely hers, and then his happy days will end.

So from all that has been said, we can conclude this: constant mistress- unreasonable and unprofitable. To calmly see and spend time with your mistress, when you want, you need, for starters, to leave the family and get a divorce. Such a decision would be logical, but, unfortunately, in our life, and especially in relationships, there is no place for any rationality and logic. But we will still try to find an explanation for why they make mistresses. married men. Let's try to understand the point of view of men and realize this situation. Let's ask ourselves the question: will we be able to forgive our partner if this suddenly happens in our life?

Most men are faithful to their woman

By by and large There are many reasons for men to have a mistress. It makes no sense to repeat, since a lot of articles have already been written on this topic. We can say this: explanations for cheating like “all men are polygamous” and “because there is no normal sex and mutual understanding” are not always correct. Often such excuses are used when it is impossible to find real reason or you don't want to say it. Not all men are so fickle, not all of them change only at the call of nature, and not everyone wants to have a mistress when there is a bad atmosphere in the family. Contrary to popular stereotypes, most of them are honest and decent people who love their family and do not want to hurt their soul mate.

Women who believe that a man will not "go left" being next to an excellent wife are wrong

Alas, the truth is that no matter how wonderful a woman is, none of us is immune from infidelity. This is not because all men are the same, it's just that we are all people with our weaknesses, and everyone has changes in life. Our feelings can change. No one is protected from this, everything can become different at any moment. It happens that in prosperous happy families such misfortunes happen.

Even ideal woman not immune from cheating

A woman can find solace and an outlet in household chores. Be that as it may, her the main task is to store family hearth always, protect your entire family from the cold of the soul. The man, having got into stressful situation, faced with problems and misunderstandings at home, will not do housework. He will be patient for a while and will go to look for a warm place. The solution to the problem is found in the arms of another woman, who will feed and drink the wanderer, and, as you know, put him to sleep. Here is your betrayal.

Okay, let's move on. Let us assume that in this situation one can understand the husband. If something happened in the house that pushed him to treason, the wife could not give in to her husband, he wanted love and warmth, and then a kind, sweet, understanding woman came under the arm. She does not demand or expect anything, she will always understand and caress. Such a mistress becomes a refuge from family storms in which a man hides. But most often, husbands cheat even when they have a smart, beautiful and loving wife, and scandals in the house - a rare event. Why does this happen?

This is another problem. Usually the reason for such betrayals is the tendency to idealize a woman. There are many men who dream of the best woman in all respects even in our time. This view is formed at a subconscious level in early age, and the desire remains for life. But family life changes everything, because through certain time the spouse understands that the woman he has chosen is quite an ordinary person who needs to drink, eat and satisfy various needs. And it has its weaknesses and shortcomings. Everything is quite prosaic and mundane in fact.

Men who dream of perfection are disappointed by such discoveries. And they again go in search of the one that they dreamed of for so long. As a result, they find a similar one, and here it is - new love coexisting next to the former love. Naturally, a man does not know about all the problems, difficulties, everyday side of this beautiful lady's life. She is always well-groomed and impeccably dressed. Still, she prepares for every date, and hides her old bathrobe when a man appears on her territory. Just a perfect woman! But soon this idea will dissipate, and it will be replaced by the realization that she is the same person as everyone else. Then the search for a new perfect creation will begin again.

Some men are looking for their ideal all their lives.

This type of change is not uncommon. If a woman met a man of this type, always looking for his ideal, life will not be easy for her. To be always desirable and best for him, you need to match certain level and his expectations, to be perfect in everything and always. If you try hard, it's quite possible. The only question is: how much strength and patience does a woman have to support this game and this image, instead of being herself. Artificiality is tiring, and it cannot last forever. After all, it won’t work out for him to be a truly unearthly creature, living in the same house, he will sooner or later see something mundane and quite ordinary anyway. It's just impossible to predict how he will act next, maybe he will reconcile, or maybe he will "go after the women." Who knows…

Well, why do men find themselves beautiful mistresses, we understand. Well, if the wife is much better outwardly? Why is this happening here?

Near beautiful woman the man becomes insecure

Since ancient times, this ratio has been established: a man mines, a woman takes care of the house. Any normal representative of the stronger sex understands this very well and tries to comply, but not everyone and not always succeeds in doing this. In family life, there are always some problems that need to be solved. In such a situation, a man can lose faith in himself, stop feeling important and needed by his family, even if the wife does not say a word about this, she understands and accepts everything. Everything happens because a man has a feeling of guilt. If at such a moment there is a woman next to him who will idolize and adore him, will not demand anything, ask, but only look with delight at her beloved, naturally, the man will become attached to her. All men want to be praised and appreciated. And if there is such a woman, then why not make her happy, show her your gratitude? No one here will turn special attention on appearance and so on, the main thing is that a man is courted like a king.

Indeed, mistresses most often make mistresses simply because they are young and it is interesting with them, they can diversify intimate life, to help distract from problems, because at home the atmosphere is tense and the like. They talk and talked about this a lot, everything is clear and understandable here. Now you need to understand why, having found yourself a good mistress, men are still in no hurry to leave the family and get divorced?

Often there is such a situation: the mistress is sure that even in a year, but the man will definitely leave his wife and family life and move to live with her. She usually argues such confidence by the fact that a man spends more and better time with her, she is more beautiful and sexier than his wife, precisely in their relationship. real love etc. But quite a lot of time passes, often it’s more than one year, and the beloved is in no hurry to leave his wife, although she “does not understand”, “does not love like me” and in general she is not what he needs, constantly shakes his nerves and rolls scandals.

A mistress can be jealous of a man for his wife

Often this situation develops not only in officially registered marriages, but also in civil ones. Well, here, it would seem, what can interfere with care? It is enough just to collect things, say goodbye and go to the one with which it is so good. But no, he doesn’t go anywhere, but fools both women for years. Why do our beloved men do this?

There are still cases when a husband finally left his wife for a mistress, but this phenomenon is quite rare and this often happens only when the atmosphere in the family is absolutely unbearable, and problems cannot be solved. If the situation is tolerable, then the man will most likely stay, while assuring his mistress that he will divorce soon, but now leaving the family needs to be postponed, because there are some problems, you don’t want to quarrel with your parents or the children haven’t grown up and they need a father . Although, in fact, a man simply understands that the farther the lady, the more attractive she is. In addition, the representatives of the stronger sex are aware that if they married a mistress, it is still not known which of her spouse will be. Perhaps all her virtues will turn out to be pretense, skillfully hidden flaws, beauty - skillfully applied makeup, and love - just a desire to get rid of loneliness.

Between wife and mistress, a man will choose a family

But even if the mistress is a good woman in all respects, it is still difficult to leave the family. Just because at home everything is your own, dear, familiar. Here you can look how you want, dress how you like, behave how you like. To be youreself. You don’t need to build someone out of yourself, pretend to be cultured and well-mannered, you can walk in worn-out slippers and holey socks (if the wife allows or doesn’t notice), and no one will judge. And the mistress still does not know what the orders will be.

It also happens, of course, that a mistress has studied her man well and is well aware of all his shortcomings, but is ready to accept them. But even here the family is better. The house is like a fire that gives real warmth and heat, and communication outside it with other women can be compared to the heat from a battery, it is just as fake, artificial. A mistress, in fact, is the happiness that a man wanted to find in marriage, something that he lacks. However, the family already exists, he created it, but starting all over again, destroying the old house is just scary - suddenly nothing will work out, but new family will be worse than before. What's the point of swapping the same thing?

For men, a mistress is a hobby or a way to have fun. There are no obligations or rules here. She will not get messages like: “Come on the way to the store. We need bread, ”she will write about how she loves and misses. The family is a place where a man's participation, his help is needed, and his lover's presence is enough. But it is precisely the fact that a man needs a family and binds him to it, because it is so pleasant for him to take care of someone and be irreplaceable.

For many mistresses, the goal is to divorce a lover from his wife, and then everything else will work out. The main thing is that it belongs only to her alone, and everyone will be happy. But everything is not so easy, because after some time, men who have left the family begin to feel homesick. It is very difficult to change habits, especially when you have already “grown” to one place. Such sudden changes are not characteristic of men; they keep their usual way of life. They can change priorities, but it will take time and a lot. So nothing will come of it quickly.

All men are owners

In addition, men are, in fact, owners. That's why they don't leave their wives. From one thought that someone else will get it, you no longer want to leave it, no matter how much you want to leave. This woman is only his and that's it. How is it that someone else will touch her?! A man can not even imagine such a turn of events. Here male pride plays, which suggests that it is better for the spouse to be nearby, so calmer.

Here they are, these men. They behave, sometimes, like small children, for whom the feelings of others are just toys. For them, attention, demand in them, significance is important. They want to be cherished and desired, and many wives often forget this. Therefore, mistresses appear who successfully manipulate these naive creatures, tying them to themselves, even sometimes without their will. And then there are problems that accompany this "triangle" of love. Like this.

Many will answer that you will not understand men. What do they lack if there is everything for complete happiness at home. But, one way or another, all the same - not full bowl in the family, since he looks to the side. You can reproach men for polygamy as much as you like, but it’s better to look for reasons in yourself, and only then, after making sure that everything is fine, honor the “scoundrel”, on which the light stands.

Why does a man need a mistress if he loves his family: relax

The wife is smart, economic, once again the scandal will not suit. But, that's bad luck, but the peasant is pulled to the side. Naturally, the question arises: what's the matter?
Outwardly, everything in the family may look good and cloudless. But if you dig deeper, it is easy to see that inside the idyll is full of unresolved problems. Of course, in a family, a man cannot show weakness and shift everything onto the shoulders of his wife. But he needs rest and relaxation. Here he is looking for their side. (Read also).
Come there at any time, so here everything is of the highest order. Always well-groomed woman in openwork linen he will feed, drink, warm, and even put him to bed. So he runs here, if only not to hammer his head with problems.

Why does a man need a mistress if he loves his family: looking for an ideal

Most men are so stuck in life that they have ceased to idealize their own wife. After all, at first she seemed almost a deity. Then, over time, he saw in her ordinary person with shortcomings, and yet the “ideal”, which has been embedded in the subconscious since childhood, is not “silent”. He asks outside. So he goes out looking for him.
Finds. Only over time, this so-called “no hitch, no hitch” image suffers the same fate as the wife. At first, this mistress is good in every way. After all, a man comes to her at a certain time and, a little later, leaves. Naturally, she appears before him in the best outfits, with a hairdo and excellent manicure. In addition, he is preparing for a meeting, and will surely please his lover with culinary delights.
But do not forget that the mistress is the same woman as the wife. She has an old shabby dressing gown, which she diligently hides in the closet so as not to stir up the soul of her lover. She also has mood swings which she doesn't show as guests are always welcome.
Over time, a man begins to notice flaws that remove his beloved from the ideal. But he doesn't stop there. He will definitely find a new passion for himself, which will be his muse for some time.

Why does a man need a mistress if he loves his family: he will leave

When the wife finds out about the existence of a rival, she is tormented by the question: will he go to her? The answer is easy and difficult at the same time. Yes, there are situations when a man goes to his mistress. But this happens in rare cases when the family is in complete disarray. Basically, the man stays with his wife. And there are answers to this. After all, a house is a fortress. Here he can appear in the living room in family shorts, walk in worn-out slippers. There - no. With his mistress, he plays the role of a macho. That's why you should always be on top. In addition, the mistress clings tightly to him and does not want to let go. (Read also). And men don't like to be prey. Therefore, they remain with a calm and understanding wife.

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