most popular phrase, which is typed by men on the Internet, is: "Married, but I love another." What is the reason for this married men fell in love again or they just can not forget the one they loved in their youth? After all, often men get married, hoping to forget the girl they truly loved. But not everyone succeeds, then the man searches the Internet for ways to forget the girl who did not reciprocate.

The desire to love is not crime if this is true love. As you know, you can't command your heart. It is customary to condemn those men who have an affair on the side. But it often happens that a guy meets a girl and it seems to him that he loves her. They get married, start a family, and having lived together for some time, the man realizes that next to him is not the woman for whom he could move mountains. If love is real, then it does not pass so quickly.

When a person some time after weddings asks the question: "Was there love?" - then this is a sign that there was no true love. It's just that many people confuse love with falling in love, which quickly passes as soon as family difficulties appear. After marriage, men realize that they made a mistake, but because of their decency, they don’t even think about getting a wife or getting a divorce. But love comes without asking permission and without considering whether a man wants to fall in love.

The whole horror lies in the fact that no matter how decent man temptations await him everywhere. He can fall in love quite unexpectedly and corny. For example, in a colleague at work, in a friend of his wife or unknown girl with whom he spoke on the bus. At first, just conversations, and then the husband-family man suddenly realizes that he has been struck down by cupid's arrow.

The most common reason why married men fall in love with another woman - this is marriage in early age. From the hands of his mother, a young guy who is only 18-20 years old, smoothly passes into the hands of his wife, who replaces his mother. At first family relations he is quite satisfied with his wife-mother and it even seems to him that he loves her, but after a while the husband “ripens” and wants to feel independent person. To prove his worth, he decides to take a decisive action and begins to look for love on the side.

Meeting another girl he goes to her. But after a few years, most of these husbands return to their first wife, especially if, after his departure, she began to take care of herself and became prettier. If they do not return, then they try to maintain friendly relations with their former wife.

IN some families husband My wife and I live like neighbors. The wife is always busy with children or work, she is not up to her husband. In this case, the husband begins to look elsewhere for the attention and care that his wife did not give him. It seems to him that that other understands him better than anyone and rejoices that at last he has found the soul mate he was looking for. But such a man leaves the family own will does not want to, especially if he and his wife already have common children.

All relationships between husband and wife come down to a constant showdown on the topic: "you didn't do this to me, but you didn't give me that." Such a husband can leave the family only if his wife kicks him out herself. In fact, he loves his wife, and takes a mistress only to satisfy his needs for female attention.

Sometimes men confuse sexual compatibility with love. Due to sexual compatibility, they lose their heads and think that they are in love for real. Meanwhile, passion passes after a couple of months, and compatibility with another passion disappears somewhere. If a man during this time managed to destroy the family, then, as a rule, he later regrets it very much. But, basically, men who are in love on sexual grounds do not leave the family.

There are many hunters for other people's husbands. Single women are especially interested in married men who are famous for their success and devotion to their wife. Seducing him with her looks and playing on male pride, she slowly but surely kindles the fire of love in his heart.

To achieve your goals she can ask him to help out in a difficult financial situation, take him home or take him to a restaurant. Over time, a decent family man, not wanting it himself, falls in love. He begins to suffer: to leave the family or not, whom does he love more, his wife or his mistress? Not always decent men who fall in love leave the family. Often he is afraid to change that lifestyle to which he is already accustomed.

Not wanting to hurt your wife, he lives with an unloved person and lies to her. At the same time, he is forced every time to justify himself to his mistress for his actions and promise her that he will soon divorce his wife and everything will change for them. But there are also men who decide to desperate step and leave the family for the one they test strong feelings. You can’t command your heart, no matter how painful it is for your wife in this case, you shouldn’t hold such a man. At least he is honest with her and gives her the opportunity to find her happiness. You just need to understand that the bitter truth is better than the sweet lie and let him go.

Video about the biological side of male infidelity, etc.

I fell in love with another

Bring back the girl

Dating & Pickup

I fell in love with another

Each love story begins with an incredible event, which is saturated with pleasant emotions and memories. And having fallen in love with one girl, a man is truly sure that it is with her that he will spend the rest of his days, create strong family and decide on children. And most often such a love story develops into marriage.

But, unfortunately, Cupid sometimes plays with people. And decent family men fall in love with other women. And then the burden of a fateful choice falls on the shoulders of a man, on which not only the fate of his family, but his own well-being will depend. After all, living with an unloved woman is a real suffering. But not everyone will agree to look at the tears of his wife.

The complexity of the question: “Leave the family for another or stay with an unloved wife?” - torments many men who have lost love for their wife. On the one hand, I want new feelings, I want passion and the brilliance of desire in the eyes of a woman. But on the other hand, I don’t want to part with my wife, who is a real partner and friend, who has earned respect and warmth.

What to do if you fell in love with another girl

Many men sincerely believe that it is impossible to fall in love with another woman while married and happy. But sometimes all events occur contrary to any logic and common sense. And the man starts dating another behind his wife's back for some time. And when the relationship develops more and more, a married man finds himself in a difficult position. He seeks advice and solutions to his problem.

And it is safe to say the following truth. If your wife is a good, kind and faithful companion who can support you in difficult situation and get out of the shower in one dressing gown and lie down with you. Then you should stop doing nonsense, cool your youthful ardor and thank God for sending such good woman such a fickle man.

In other words, if you play in one place, then think about the consequences and your future. It will become clear to you that extreme sensations can be obtained in another way, and it is not necessary to cheat on your wife and leave home.

If you fell out of love with your wife and fell in love with another

If your relationship with your wife has long ceased to be rosy, and you realized that it is time to change everything in better side. Then you must show that you are a Man and tell your wife the truth. Tell me why you started dating another woman and what you don't like about your wife. Silence is also good choice if you haven't already decided everything for yourself.

But there can be two ways out of this situation:

1) Your wife forgives you. You no longer want to date another woman. Peace, tranquility, love reign in the family. And you will be fine.

2) Your wife does not forgive you. You have the illusion that you are free and it is time to fully devote yourself to another woman. But let me tell you a little about it. If a woman is really worth anything, she will leave you. Why should she be sure that if you succumbed to the charms of one girl, this will not happen to you a second time?

Be honest with yourself and with your wife. Remember, you once swore an oath to love your wife. Which means she deserved it. Take care of what you have. "And the grass isn't always greener next door."

When to love someone else

The only reason you can divorce your wife is your misfortune. When you wake up and realize that this is not the life and not the woman that you would like to see next to you. You are not at all attracted to her, it is impossible to talk to her normally. Only the sounds of the saw have become commonplace for you.

Then, if you have found a girl who really appreciates you, you can think about leaving. After all, then even the slightest hope for happiness will be greater than you have right now.

Your happiness is your happiness. If you feel that your wife can no longer make you happy, and another woman brings you joy. Decide what consequences your decision will cause, and only then, choose. In any case, patience, common sense and, of course, luck will be on your side.

“I have two children, I lived with my wife for more than 15 years. But it so happened that for the past 6 years I have been in love with another woman. I'm really tired of deceiving my wife and I want to get a divorce. I don’t know how to make my wife not hurt very much, and try to remain at least not enemies. In any case, she is a good and dear person to me ... ".

“We have a child and a marriage that is 8 years old. Of these, for three years I really love another woman, my wife knows about it and in every possible way restrains my impulses to leave the family. But I know that all this is serious, and there is very little left for me to mature to a responsible step.

“I left as soon as I realized that I fell in love with another, because I think this is much more honest than deceiving the mother of your children for several years. The divorce was very difficult, but we survived it, and after 5 years ex-wife forgive and understand me. Happy in a new marriage, I do not regret anything.

Here are just some excerpts from the letters of our readers, the situation is not easy, agree? And what to do, how best to act - decisively and irrevocably, or wait and hope for chance? Let's try to figure it out.

Let's start with the fact that the case when a married man falls in love with another woman is not at all an isolated one, and in order to try to answer the question "What to do and how to be?", let's figure out why this happened.

Possible reasons, or what you missed in marriage:

• freedom or personal space;
• passion and love;
• care and respect;
• understanding and trust.

If a person constantly experiences at least one of the above, then someday as a result he will earn depression or a nervous state. And this is quite normal if he wants a different attitude towards himself. And when a woman appears who does not limit him in all this, then, naturally, feelings arise.

What if you love someone else

Let's start with, if you realized that you fell in love with another woman and you can no longer give this feeling to your wife, then you must agree that you are dishonest towards her. It turns out that you provided yourself with the choice to love and be loved, but you didn’t even provide it to your wife.

Hiding behind caring for the child, you thus mask your fear of taking responsibility with the fact that when the child grows up, he will not understand or forgive you. But remember, it has long been proven that in families where parents live without love, but only for the sake of raising a child, nothing good happens, and children grow up only with an unstable nervous system. Because children are more sensitive and receptive, and even without understanding what exactly is happening between their parents, they feel coldness, lack of love, tension, etc. And from this they begin to suffer greatly and attribute the blame for what is happening to themselves. So it’s better to choose honesty, and explain to the child that mom and dad are breaking up because they don’t love each other anymore. But this has nothing to do with him, as they loved him, and will continue to treat him, for example, you can call dad at any time.

Nobody argues, the fork is very difficult, and it is very difficult to decide where to stay.

The first scenario is to stay in the family, continue to live without loving and constantly think about another woman, who, by the way, will also be unhappy, suffer silently and be afraid to make a choice. With your fear, hurt your wife and "punish" her by the fact that she does not shine to be near you, and a child who will observe all the problems between parents.

The second option is to take responsibility for the current situation, talk with your wife and child, and resolve financial and organizational issues. To allow his wife to meet another man, to make the woman he loves happy, and, in the end, to find happiness himself.

Well, now let's see what you have to comprehend, take into account and live in practice:

• Wife's reaction- few people accept such news calmly and with dignity, so no matter how balanced your spouse is, it’s quite normal to prepare for scandals, tantrums, slamming doors and throwing things out of the balcony .
• Degree of dependence on spouse, her relatives and friends- if you are in any way (income, career) dependent on them, then this is a great reason to think. Or urgently start looking for a replacement for all this.
• The attitude of one's own parents and friends to this situation- it is quite possible that everyone will treat it as a regularity of life, or there may be misunderstanding, alienation and open confrontation.
• Number of children and their age- it is clear that the more they are married and the younger they are, the more pangs of conscience and not only you have to endure.
• Children's attitude towards your care- if the kids already understand everything and are trying with all their might to leave you in the house, then you are faced with a difficult task, you will have to talk a lot and for a long time, convince, seek a compromise.
• Your age - it will be much easier for a man from 23 to 40 years old to survive all this, but for lovers over 40 years old, it’s already worth thinking three times - is it all worth it or not?
• Health status- it is clear that the stronger your health, the more confident you will go to new life, but if you have any severe chronic diseases or disabilities, then you should think carefully. Will they definitely accept you there with all these nuances, will they take care of you, etc.
• Own living space for further residence - this is also worth thinking about, well, of course, if you or your wife have alternative housing, otherwise problems cannot be avoided.
• Income level- it’s much easier if you don’t have problems with this, but if you lived “totally tight”, then think about it, because in new family spending at first will be even more than now, plus alimony will be added.

Consider all these points, but remember that any obstacles and circumstances fade before real love and sincere relationships. Your task is to get out of the situation beautifully and with dignity, to remain a man, a person and try to alleviate the situation of loved ones as much as possible. Life is one, and we must try to live it happily, which is what we wish you!

Briefly, my situation is as follows. I am a family man. I have a wife and a little daughter 2.5 years old. I am 39, my wife is 33. My wife and I have been together for over 13 years. Our feelings, of course, have cooled down over time, but still we love each other. And both love our daughter very much, who we got with difficulty and who is very, very long-awaited for us.

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